Anthony Earnshaw

Flick Knives & Forks

These jots and titles will provide ideal stretcherside.

Struck down at midnight he moaned, "I've missed the last ambulance."

When the ambulance came, it was full.

Be nonchalant. Carry your bits of fluff and tobacco sheds without fears for their future. Remember, respect is always given to the constents of a dead man's pockets.

It is apt that obituaries end with a full stop.

Came a woeful cry from the depths, "I wish I'd never found this Wishing Wells".

War broke out between Friends and Foes. BLACK NEWS, the Foes were winning.

"We must sue for peace," concealed their Warlord.

"Now, when victory is in sight?" his lieutenants protested.

"Certainly," he replied, "for unless this slaughter is scotched, we won't have a friend left."

The salvo of grapeshot was fruitless, the gunners had missed the target ...unscathed, the enemy still advanced.

"They are small potatoes, not worth killing anyhow," muttered the Captain, sourly.

Gold plated barbed wire for de luxe wars.

The child's whimper provides descant to the tramp of jackboots.

Misfortune smiles when bandages turn a cheerful red.

The hero is one who returns to the battle binding his wounds with camouflaged bandages.

Stench is to the nose as pain is to the wound.

Thanks to heroes, we know how to strike medals.

One of the spoils of battle was a cache of stretchers.


Please contact for prices if you are interested in purchasing signed or unsigned copies of Carping & Kicking or Flick Knives & Forks